opheliaswims

President Roosevelt’s New Deal: “Relief, Reform and Reconstruction.”

President Bush’s Deal: “Rescue”

“The Simple Guv”: reality show starring the small town Guv and the Palin Clan and their neighbors the Russians.

“Extreme Makeover”: a realtiy show about how a small town hockeymom goes from mayor to VP in less than four years. Starring Sarah Palin

Punk’d: This week’s show we have the GOP getting Punk’d with Sarah Palin. Hijinks ensue!

“I Love Wasilla!” Guv. Sarah Palin is in a quest to find her soul mate, is it the Navy Boy or Tango? This week’s episode has Tango…

This is a direct excerpt from Katie Couric’s One-On-One interview with Sarah Palin, which aired Wednesday on CBS.

COURIC: Why isn’t it better, Governor Palin, to spend $700 billion helping middle-class families struggling with health care, housing, gas and groceries? … Instead of helping these big financial institutions that played a role in creating this mess?

PALIN: Ultimately, what the bailout does is help those who are concerned about the health care reform that is needed to help shore up the economy– Oh, it’s got to be about job creation too. So health care reform and reducing taxes and reining in spending has got to accompany tax reductions.

Need a new word for that Business Plan? I got them for you here…

I lied when I said I liked your shoes.

I lied when I said I couldn’t make it to your dinner party.

I lied when I said I didn’t accidentally spill the milk.

I lied when I said nothing.

I lied when I moved your heart.

I lied when I really loved you when I only liked you.

I lied when I said Yes.

I lied when I said Maybe, when I really meant No.

I lied when the fish died.

I lied when I was drunk.

I lied when I was looking into your eyes.

I lied when I said I was.

©ophelia chong

It started as a comment on the $300 million ad campaign by Microsoft…on Twitter

qthrul I’m a Mac, and a PC, and a Linux, and a BlackBerry, and an OpenMoko, and apparently a niche demographic not worthy of a $300M ad campaign.

@qthrul i rather have a sock puppet than seinfeld, or better yet just a sock. a sock is more persuasive than seinfeld.

@ophelia a sock is the absent lover lost to time… idle and crushed upon itself behind a strange washing machine or dryer… long forgotten

@qthrul the sock sits between the wall and the dryer, it sees only darkness and dust. forever lost to it’s partner.

@qthrul the lonely sock partner has no foot but an orange, swung between bulls by a rodeo clown at children eating deep fried twinkies.

@ophelia indeed… they just don’t write enough songs about the unrequited love of a sock

@qthrul as i stand here, holding up two socks amongst a pile of identical socks, i create new relationships willy nilly.

@ophelia i’m a fan of free sock love as well… your open embrace of open pairing truly makes the universe a more loving place

@qthrul i am a card carrying SockSexual. Socks should be free to match up regardless of color & length, puffy white balls, even toe socks.

@ophelia my life started with tube socks but in college I experimented with black socks (a phase) and came back to reinforced athletic socks

@qthrul i have dared to go Sock-less, it wasn’t easy. but once i got over my shyness over showing my exposed toes, I was fine.

Who can you trust? In the new world, we can be anyone or anything we want to be online…The Handshake

@Ophelia Chong

Asked the question “if your life was a Sit Com, what would it be?” on HowToSplitAnAtom

My answer:

My show would be non-linear iambic pentameter. The show would start with one thought and then end on the opposite or on a 90Ëš angle. Characters would flow in and out, some would leave a mark, others would say nothing. The soundtrack is tonal and plays against what mood is being portrayed.

My show would begin with one idea and end with a hundred.

The Sound of Clicking ©Ophelia Chong

Sonnet IV  by Wm. Shakespeare

Unthrifty loveliness, why dost thou spend
Upon thy self thy beauty’s legacy?
Nature’s bequest gives nothing, but doth lend,
And being frank she lends to those are free:
Then, beauteous niggard, why dost thou abuse
The bounteous largess given thee to give?
Profitless usurer, why dost thou use
So great a sum of sums, yet canst not live?
For having traffic with thy self alone,
Thou of thy self thy sweet self dost deceive:
Then how when nature calls thee to be gone,
What acceptable audit canst thou leave?
Thy unused beauty must be tombed with thee,
Which, used, lives th’ executor to be.

The latest post on HTSAA. From 31 Flavors to 31 Million websites, how not to fall to the Flavor of the Month.

Noun: satisfaction or pleasure felt at someone else’s misfortune.

We love to read about a celebrity’s downfall, or a politician’s sex scandal; but why? As quickly as something is built, we tear down at the foundations. We need to be collaborative, and think outside of ourselves. There is a part of us that is instinctual and will help someone in need without thinking. Saving someone from a burning car, helping a fallen comrade; that instinct kicks in. Why can’t we do that when we are “thinking”?